Affinity Counselling

Causes of Stress

The situations and pressures that cause stress are known as stressors. We usually think of stressors as being negative, such as an exhausting work schedule or a rocky relationship.

However, anything that puts high demands on you or forces you to adjust can be stressful. This includes positive events such as getting married, buying a house, going to college, or receiving a promotion.

What causes stress depends, at least in part, on your perception of it.

For example, your morning commute may make you anxious and tense because you worry that traffic will make you late. Others, however, may find the trip relaxing because they allow more than enough time and enjoy listening to music while they drive.

• Divorce

• Marriage separation
• Jail term

• Death of a close relative
• Injury or illness

• Marriage

• Fired from job
• Marriage reconciliation

• Retirement
• Spouse's death

 

Source: Holmes-Rahe Life Stress Inventory

 

Counselling Can Help you to recognise and understand your stressors and to find ways to manage yourself in these situations.  Talking through your feelings and describing your responses to those feelings can be the first step towards releasing the stress itself.

 

Common external causes of stress

Not all stress is caused by external factors. Stress can also be self-generated:

 

• Major life changes
• Work Relationship difficulties
• Financial problems
• Being too busy
• Children and family

Common internal causes of stress 

• Inability to accept uncertainty

• Pessimism 
• Negative self-talk

• Unrealistic expectations

• Perfectionism Lack of assertiveness

 

 

Stress Warning Signs and Symptoms

Cognitive Symptoms

• Memory problems

• Inability to concentrate

• Poor judgment

• Seeing only the negative

• Anxious or racing thoughts

    ·     Constant worrying

Emotional Symptoms

• Moodiness

• Irritability or short temper

• Agitation, inability to relax

• Feeling overwhelmed

• Sense of loneliness and isolation

    ·    Depression or general unhappiness

 

Source: The Language of Emotional Intelligence by Jeanne Segal, Ph.D.